May you be with him in his moment of loneliness and despair. Please open his mind and heart to all possibilities in life, and in you. Once again Lord, I pray for his conversion, for a new life for him, please allow him Easter. May you give him happiness, send him someone who can truly make him happy. Have mercy on us, I know we have failed you greatly. Please grant us another beginning. He is a good man. He just needs to grow up. Thank you for being so patient with us. Please bear with us, we can still do better. I can see hope Lord, thank you. I know there is a greater world out there for us, I can feel it in my heart. Thank you, I hold on to your promises. I know there is something about our existence that is important enough not to be wasted. He seems to be wasting away his life but I believe there is still hope for him. It was you who said you will bless everyone that comes my way, it was you who said "watch what I will do with your life" I believe that Lord, I know there something waiting for me out there. He will be part of these promoses, he too will ne blessed. It was you who promised that Lord and I praise and thank yor most holy name for that. As for me, I will just do my part in serving you, in spreading your words of love, salvation, forgiveness and peace. That is the one thing that I can already promise you now. Thank you so much Lord you are such an amazing God I cannot ask for more, father.

Where I hide

This is where I go when everything seems to be not working in a way I want them. This is where I go when I feel the world has turn its back on me. It is so amazing how much surviving for life sometimes could change people. I wish I know better than being affected by how unfeeling people can get sometimes. I know there is so much that I can offer. I know I've got so much to share to the world. Yet there are times when insecurities get the better of me. But I want to fight it off. These days seems to be a plateau stage for me, as far as my growth as a person is concerned. Something seems to be pulling me back from sprinting. There is so much out there, waiting for me to conquer, to experience. In fact I can't wait to touch them already. But why does it become too unreachable each time. But I am writing to keep myself from giving up. I am writing to cheer myself on. I am writing to make myself feel less alone. Right now I just feel so misunderstood by the world, so misjudged. I want to be happy. I am happy. There is so much to be happy about. There is so much to celebrate about. But my life as a counselor to almost everyone in my circle sometimes gets the better of me. I guess I am just overwhelmed with negative energies these days. I have to shake it off and be in control. At the end of the day, there is nothing that I can take any blame for my misfortunes, or my bruises, or my loneliness but myself. I am in control.

I wish I can get out of this rut soonest. I have been hibernating, just holding the pen but can't start anything at all. Dear Lord please help me start writing again. Please help us arrange our lives and be more productive. I want to be productive Lord I want my days to be fulfilled. I want to be the best that I can be for you. I am so sorry for failing you. I guess I will start tonight. I will read tomorrow's gospel and post reflections a night before. I want to be the best Lord, I want to do as you told me to do. I am sorry. I will start now. At least this.